The Haiku RPG Kickstarter

I am very excited to announce the Haiku RPG Kickstarter. For those who have longed to include Asian poetry into your gaming, your desires will now be satisfied. The Haiku RPG features a game system that combines the class system of the early editions of the World's Most Popular Fantasy Game with the skill system of PDQ. Character classes include Zen Meditator, Tea Ceremony Master, Bonsai Gardener, and Geisha. Attributes are generated using 2 five-sided dice and 1 seven-sided die (included).

The boxed set for Haiku RPG will include:
  • Haiku RPG Rulebook
  • 2 five-sided dice
  • 1 seven-sided die
  • A campaign setting: Blackpoem by Cob Ronley
  • An adventure module: Knowledge Obfuscates by Shim Torts
A contribution of $87.22, gets you in at the ground level for the box set. Check out the items if you bump up your gold pieces:
  • At the $123.02 Level: You get a ceremonial tea cup, signed by someone with a Sharpee.
  • At the $202.88 Level: You get a poster-sized picture of Erik Tenkar (suitable for framing, for darts, and for scaring young children out of the basement).
  • At the $458.13 Level: You get the Haiku Megadungeon, filled with wandering poems and magical tea ceremonies.
  • At the $876.00 Level: You get an actual Japanese Maple Tree, suitable for planting in your yard. The tree might even be alive if you pay extra for speedy shipping.
  • At the $1,604.29 Level: You get one of my haikus, printed on the back of scrap paper from work, and signed by me (or someone that I work with).
I am working on stretch goals and am open to suggestions. Here are a few that are in process:
  • The Tome of Order, featuring over 500 modrons statted and ready for your Haiku RPG game.
  • Haiku Fragments, a hardcover book containing tens of haiku started by me but never finished.
  • Breaking Haiku, another hardcover book of haiku-like poetry with six or eight syllables in the second line (instead of seven). So edgy.
  • The Master Teapot: A finely made teapot in the shape of E. Gary Gygax's head.
Feel free to suggest your best ideas for Haiku RPG. I am so pleased to be rolling this out on April 1.


  1. Big shout-out to the Modron stretch goal. And if it's helpful, "The one and the prime" is five syllables. Just sayin'.

  2. I love this! I'll be smiling all day.

  3. Damnit, more coffee on the laptop screen!

  4. Oh my gosh. I loved this. Made me laugh and that's no easy feet right now as I am cranky with sickness. Loved this. Thanks for posting it.

    Really funny. Really really funny.

  5. $876 isn't that bad for a Japanese Maple.

    1. They get you on the expedited shipping...

  6. @Jason: I had to explain the modron to my wife, who has limited experience as a gamer.

    1. Well, not everyone wastes brain space on an obscure set of "monsters" from the MMII from back, what, early '80s?

    2. No, I waste enough brain space for two.

  7. @Happy: I will start calling your husband "Shim" from now on.

    @Bard & Satyre: Glad you enjoyed it.

    @Peter D: You are right. Maybe I should have said, "A branch from one of my Japanese maples..."

  8. Awesome Ken!

    Maybe Mike Nystul can borrow some ideas for you to fund his unfunded Kickstarters ;)

    1. He should have added the Tenkar poster. It is the cureall for ailing Kickstarters.