Haiku 16--Ghoul

pallid flesh stretched tight

paralysis comes your way;

elves laugh in disdain

Haiku 15--Shambling Mound

mobile hungry plant
feeds on electrical spark;
vegan he is not

Haiku 14--Flind

fiend folio gnoll

sociologist's gnoll, too...

flindbar finds target

Haiku 13--Blue Dragon

This is a blues weekend at our house. I was a substitute bass player for Chicago Bob and the Butchers at a local blues festival on Saturday night ("No, kids, Daddy is not a scab, he is a substitute."). Tonight, we are going to hear (and see) Buddy Guy in concert. So, in keeping with the blues, I offer this haiku:

sparks and bolts erupt
spewing high voltage current;
elven hair stands on end

Haiku 12--Ogre

big bodied...dimmed wit
weaklings become next meal;
still barely giant class

Elf, a Haiku (Haiku 11)

pointy ear pansies...
prance under moon with bow and sword;
dancing with the stars

Haiku 10: Orc

orcs rain destruction
cockroaches from world's dark past...
evil comes to all

Haiku 9: Kobold

A repost from my old blog:

dangerfield geckos
little lizards of vile hate;
respect the K-bold

Haiku 8: Flumph

tentacled floaty--
jellyfish surfs gusty breeze;
death to evil foes

Swords & Wizardry, a Haiku (Haiku 7)

I am kicking off a whole week of Swords & Wizardry posts (sorry GURPS guys and gals). I wanted to hit the ground running with haiku (sorry Matt J.). This is also my 100th post since restarting my blog, so haiku is definitely the way to go:

the little brown books
old school made shiny and new;
AC down and up

Five For Friday 15: Quinton, a Haiku (Haiku #6)

Hey, kids: Today we have a very special episode of Five for Friday, one that features haiku and modrons and the Five for Friday theme all rolled into one glorious post. This was actually posted on my original Rusty Battle Axe Blog (which makes my current blog a retroclone, I suppose). Here--without further interruptions or digressions--is the Quinton:

fifth order modron
bureau chiefs keep our records;
five bendy arms strike

The Haiku RPG Kickstarter

I am very excited to announce the Haiku RPG Kickstarter. For those who have longed to include Asian poetry into your gaming, your desires will now be satisfied. The Haiku RPG features a game system that combines the class system of the early editions of the World's Most Popular Fantasy Game with the skill system of PDQ. Character classes include Zen Meditator, Tea Ceremony Master, Bonsai Gardener, and Geisha. Attributes are generated using 2 five-sided dice and 1 seven-sided die (included).

The boxed set for Haiku RPG will include:

• Haiku RPG Rulebook
• 2 five-sided dice
• 1 seven-sided die
• A campaign setting: Blackpoem by Cob Ronley
• An adventure module: Knowledge Obfuscates by Shim Torts

A contribution of $87.22, gets you in at the ground level for the box set. Check out the items if you bump up your gold pieces:

• At the $123.02 Level: You get a ceremonial tea cup, signed by someone with a Sharpee.
• At the $202.88 Level: You get a poster-sized picture of Erik Tenkar (suitable for framing, for darts, and for scaring young children out of the basement).
• At the $458.13 Level: You get the Haiku Megadungeon, filled with wandering poems and magical tea ceremonies.
• At the $876.00 Level: You get an actual Japanese Maple Tree, suitable for planting in your yard. The tree might even be alive if you pay extra for speedy shipping.
• At the $1,604.29 Level: You get one of my haikus, printed on the back of scrap paper from work, and signed by me (or someone that I work with).

I am working on stretch goals and am open to suggestions. Here are a few that are in process:

• The Tome of Order, featuring over 500 modrons statted and ready for your Haiku RPG game.
• Haiku Fragments, a hardcover book containing tens of haiku started by me but never finished.
• Breaking Haiku, another hardcover book of haiku-like poetry with six or eight syllables in the second line (instead of seven). So edgy.
• The Master Teapot: A finely made teapot in the shape of E. Gary Gygax's head.

Feel free to suggest your best ideas for Haiku RPG. I am so pleased to be rolling this out on April 1.

Beholder, a Haiku (Haiku 5)

A repost from my old blog...

serenely floating
sphere of sure and certain doom;
eyes wink at the world

Hafling, a Haiku (Haiku 4)

hairy feet hobbits--
or, dyno riding shorties;
tolkien kin watches

A repost from my old blog

Giant Spider, a Haiku (Haiku 3)

eight legs and chitin
poison lurking high in web;
saving throw or die

Drow...a Haiku (Haiku 2)

A reworked haiku from my old Rusty Battle Axe blog...

 

elf misunderstood
or queen of dark evil deep;
no one knows for sure

Lich...a Haiku (Haiku 1)

preserved wizard bones
evil incarnate spins spells…
Death rolls down on us